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Press Release
For Immediate Release
Contact: Kelly Vrooman

Young Vrooman Woman Finds Car With Some Difficulty

Canton Ohio, June 29, 2004 - Mansfield native and Canton resident, Kelly Vrooman (22), finally located what she describes as "A cute little car that will make me feel good."

After an extensive and relatively unsuccessful internet search for a new vehicle to replace her 1995 Chevy Berretta with a cracked windshield, dented door and dilapidated windshield wiper, Vrooman chose to consult her close friends and family on the issue.

Auto expert, Jason Harsh, whose vehicular education includes having a close friend who "knows a lot about cars" and a dad who works for Ford, was the first to accompany Vrooman in her search. The two made their way to several car dealerships but returned home empty handed due to what the car sales people referred to as "The inability to look like people we would want to talk to."

Britni Strickland, a close friend of Vrooman, joined the young car-shopper for what Vrooman called "Moral Support". Due to the fact that a car salesman had undressed Kelly with his eyes and talked to her like she was stupid, Strickland's presence was meant to buffer the discomfort caused by interaction with "testosterone-driven-car-crazy perverts". This plan worked until Vrooman and Strickland arrived at the car lot and realized that Strickland is in fact a young woman, and a cute one at that.

Celia King of 1329 23rd Street gave her input as to what she would have said to the overly friendly salesman: "Is it normally company policy for you to sexually harass me?"
Vrooman spent the next three nights thinking of other things she could have said and regretting her spinelessness in car-shopping situations.

The first positive experience came when Vrooman, dressed in a suit thanks to the guidance of her Theatre Director, Tammie McKenzie who is also a female car-buyer, entered the car dealership with feigned confidence and poise. Playing the part of a successful business woman Vrooman said to the car salesman in a professional and firm tone, "Hi, I've had some unpleasant car-purchasing experiences in the past. Don't show me anything I don't want and don't talk to me like I'm stupid...Oooo, let's look at this one!" The salesman, in turn treated her with what Vrooman describes as "real cuddly niceness. "I wanted to pinch his cheeks."

The car that eventually stole Vrooman's heart was discovered on Bob Snyder's Auto lot in Orrville, Ohio, when Vrooman and her friend Tucker Russell were visiting a friend's family. She had originally spotted a Honda Civic, but after test driving it, decided the car was "kind of crappy". She then test drove a little red 2000 Ford Focus. When she returned to the Auto lot after the test drive, Bob Snyder, a self-proclaimed car lover and awkward conversationalist, told Vrooman that the car she wanted to trade-in was beyond help. He then proceeded to make fun of Vrooman's car, causing her to mentally kick him in the shins and back hand him across the face. When Vrooman reported to Bob that the CD player in the focus was not working he responded by quickly saying "Well, there's no reason it shouldn't." This did not help Vrooman's subtly violent thoughts toward Bob's behavior to vanish.

While Bob's social skills proved to be deficient, Vrooman's interest in the Ford Focus grew. She called her brother, Ryan Vrooman (20) of Mansfield to take a trip out to Orrville and inspect the desired vehicle. After receiving a proverbial thumbs up, Vrooman has decided to take the leap of faith and purchase a car in her name for the first time ever!

When asked for any final remarks, Vrooman said that she would like to thank her Dad and brother for being so nice, and send a special greeting to all those who helped her in the car-shopping process, especially Aunt Connie who co-signed. She would also like to let all the car salesman who "helped" her along the way know that they are never welcome to any afternoon tea parties that she may throw in the future.

As the Everetts head to their Canadian Island escape, I will be watering their plants. Oh, little plants, please love me. I will treat you kindly.

A few weeks ago, Jeff, Jeremy and I were in a car and were pulling to the side of a country road to take a look at the meaningful surroundings. Genius Jeffrey (who apparently has not passed that stage of perception when children pull back the covers of an empty bed to find someone hiding or look behind a mirror and expect to see their identical twin lurking behind) decides to pull off the road and plops his car into a ditch ("But the grass was tall and it didn't look like there was a ditch there!")
It took a macho man in an SUV and another guy proudly donning an "I BLAME CANADA" shirt to push us out.
Good news: People of Smithville, Ohio are very friendly, even if they do blame Canadians. Let's be real, who wouldn't?

Seth recently asked me after reading my blog, if I was sad. I don't know if I'm sad. I do, however, think there are some reasons for me to be very sad: Nate Dilyard's death, I'm moving away from family and friends, I don't have any idea how to handle my decrepit finances, Aunt Rita's cancer.
So, yes, there is some sadness in my life and some of the main factors are things I can't change.
But even with this sadness, there have been times lately when something has struck me as hilarious. So much so that I cry when I laugh and my sides hurt. I guess many things in life have a strange balance of perfect and imperfect, terrible and wonderful. Like chocolate truffles: They're great, but they're unhealthy. Or warm summer days: They're lazy and fantastic, but are accompanied by mosquitoes and sunburns.

I've graduated from college and it hit me last night when I was hanging out at the movie theatre with 8 of Malone's employees and professors who I am able to call friends. I laugh giddily and nervously like the dorky Freshman invited to the Senior's slumber party.

I work as an intern at The Players Guild Theatre (PG). The term 'intern' has many connotations. Pion, student, sex scandal, photo-copier, coffee-maker...But this internship has proven to be much more than this (completely eliminating the sex scandal part). I have been given the opportunity to really learn about how a community theatre runs, to grow familiar with the ins and outs of public relations and the integration of my world view in my work life.
I've gotten to be friends with my co-workers after working here for a year and 3 months. Amy Marie Sima, Laurel Keller, Joe Carmola, Josh Erichsen, Jean Reahm, Janet Barry, Bill Fry, Andrea Schaffner and Stephen Becker have all become part of my first possitive out of school, out-in-the-workplace-doing-what-I-love experience!
The cover of the Art section of the local paper featured Hanson (Remember Mmm-Bop?). "Where the heck did Hanson go" you might ask. Well, Canton, Ohio, along with the old members of Destiny's Child, Mr. Big, and the guy who sang 'I Where My Sunglasses At Night'.
Well, I cut out the picture of Hanson and signed a note to Josh (the PG costumer) pretending the note was from Zac, Tyler and Isaac Hanson (Yes, I know all of their names). Well, the cast of our current stage production, 'Titanic' now thinks the note was real and keeps asking Josh if he really knows Hanson and remarking on the intensity of Josh's newly developed 'Cool' factor.
Everyone makes fun of Hanson until someone knows them and then even that slight connection to fame becomes admirable. What is our obsession with the cult of celebrity?
The staff in the offices have all found it to be pretty funny.

What is the purpose of this blog? The original intent was to keep my friends and family informed of my activities and thoughts while I was living in Los Angeles. But now I'm home and can keep everyone updated without the blog, but let's be real, I don't really keep anyone up to date. I can go days without calling my parents, friends or professor/friends that I love. And in July I am moving to Pennsylvania to work with the professional company of the Pennsylvania Renaissance Faire. The blog, while maintaining it's present name, will then be referred to as 'Kelly Does PA".
Debby Hofmann got married last weekend. I had met and spent some time with every member of the wedding party before (Some were great friends), so it felt really great to be standing up there with all of them to support Debby and Zach. Debby couldn't have been more Debby-like, especially when she blew her nose in front the entire congregation. I laughed.
But when the doors opened and I saw her standing at the back of the church with the sunlight dancing behind her, I started to cry. I'm not even sure why. I have no desire to be married right now, at least not when I think of what a marriage takes, so that wasn't it. I will miss Debby, but am also glad to see her in such a good place. I cried because I began to realize that change is happening.
Am I where I always wanted to be at the age of 22? I'm not famous. My butt isn't as tight as I hoped it would be when I was a teen and I don't wear a C-cup. I'm not married to a prince.
And I'm not quite sure that these are the things I still value. I at least hope not, but the messages I receive all day long tell me I should value these things. Granted, if Prince William called I'd probably go out with him once or twice...But then I'd have to say, "William, you and I are in different places. We just don't have compatible goals."
So, please keep checking out my blog my dear friends, because it will get interesting, I promise and there are few things I enjoy as much as hearing you say, "So, I read your blog today..." And then start up some type of conversation regarding the 'blah blah blah' of my life and how it pertains to yours.